Energisers and energy drains
By Marcia Francois
First published in June 2003
I was on a course this week and all of us were asked to think about a situation that brought us immense joy and happiness. When analysing the accompanying feelings, I realised that when thinking about this situation, I also had a huge amount of energy and I felt free! It wasn’t a bind or a burden to do this. In fact, I felt like I wanted to clear my life so that I had more time to do this.
For me, this was speaking in front of big groups of people, motivating and inspiring them to take action in their lives.
If I had to ask you to put yourself in that situation, a couple of you would feel as I did. The majority of you would cringe, get tense and experience all sorts of negative characteristics. Why is that?
Probably because people get energised by different things. (Okay, I do know that the number 1 fear most people have is public speaking. More people fear public speaking than death!)
Think about a situation that does energise you.
Are you alone? Are you at home or at work? Who are you with? I want you to feel what it’s like to be energized so that you’re clearer about what drains you.
I’m sure you’ve noticed how sometimes just thinking about certain things can absolutely drain you of energy. Maybe these are unfinished tasks you have to do around the house or phone calls/ emails you’ve been delaying. You can also experience this same energy drain by being with certain people or by doing certain things you hate doing. Surely the idea of life is to have fun and to be energised?
Now think of an example from your own life that drains you of energy and answer the following questions.
1. Do I have to, or really want to do it? Yes or no?
If your answer is no, then why are you doing it? Is it because you feel pressure from family or friends to do it? Or even worse, in my opinion, is it because of self-imposed pressure? This is a biggie for me. Just asking yourself this one question immediately roots out things that you shouldn’t even be thinking of doing. Instead, tell yourself that you’re not going to do anything you don’t want to. It is okay to do this – don’t feel guilty J
If your answer is yes, then go on to the next question.
2. Why is this so draining for me?
Maybe you’ve allowed too little time to do something and the thought of having to rush is stressing you out! Do you fear confronting people? What’s the worse thing that could happen if you tell people that you don’t want to do something? Most people won’t have a problem and if they do, so what? Maybe they shouldn’t really be in your life if they don’t like you being honest with them…
3. What can you do to eliminate this drain from your life?
This is definitely the easiest part as it simply involves taking action. You can eliminate energy drains by thinking up some action plans to get it over and done with, or you can decide once and for all that you don’t want to do it anymore.
All this involves is communicating it to relevant people and that’s it! It is not a sin for your priorities to change. Maybe something that you thought was important to you three months ago is no longer important. For example, maybe you decided that you weren’t giving enough time to your friends and that you needed to spend four evenings a month with them. If it’s starting to be a drain, communicate! Remember that other people can’t read your mind. And decide on something that works for you.
When I was looking at my diary for the last month, it seems as if a lot didn’t get done. It started being a huge energy drain for me. When I started asking myself these questions however, I realised that a lot of my “to do items” were just habits but actually were no longer important to me.
This month I will let go! Repeat after me – I will let go, I will let go, I will let go.
Download the energy drains worksheet and get cracking :-)
Until next month…
Enjoy love and success
(C) Marcia Francois
Marcia Francois is a personal life coach and professional organiser who teaches busy people how to have more time, less stress and a more organised and fulfilled life. Visit http://takechargesolutions.org/ for your free Organise your Home e-book and other helpful tips.
